Hey everybody, I've decided to finally change my life.. But before I get into details I want to give you a little background on my life,and my reasoning's for doing this. When I was in high school I weighed about 170-180 lbs(I'm 5'3-not healthy at all),I wasn't always overweight but the emotional stress I was dealing with just kinda pushed me( my parents/other family members in an out of the hospital). When I finally graduated, my best friend
Zach<3 came to me and kinda told me he was concerned about me, his talk pushed me so I decided to do something, I lost 50lbs by walking to work/wii fit, i got down to about 135lbs. I hit a plateau and could not manage to lose any weight. I was content as long as I wasn't putting anything on. In our town on the first weekend of June we have an event called Sunfest; parades, fireworks, vendors, music, and a dance at a local night club called the Element. Every year I volunteer with my dad and sister, and we walk with the Selkirk College parade then I help the vendors at the park. Well that day at the park I got to spend with Zach, now Zach was the life of the party, he always had a smile, and did what ever he could to make others smile), Zach and I spoke of our futures,plans, things we want to do.Zach and I spoke of my relationship with Jordon; who was also one of Zach's good friends.Zach was always so "stoked" to talk about us, since he is responsible for us being together. I told him I thought Jordon was the one, Zach said if you marry him I'm going to be the best man at the wedding.Zach and I met up with my parents and sister, with he always welcomed them with a big hug and smile. He then later invited me to go to the Element for the party, I'm not big on clubs nor partying, so I said maybe next time, The last thing Zach said to me was "Always Smile." Then tragedy hit when Zach went missing, later that night after enjoying himself at the club, the morning after Zach's mom and his sister were waitig for Jordon in the parking lot at his work, to see if he had heard from Zach. Jordon called me to see if I had heard from him which I hadn't I went to talk to my parent's to tell them Zach was missing, my dad got so upset he said come on lets go look for him, It was unusual for Zach to not contact anyone in his family or his friends. We spent weeks searching for him, his family and friends were all sent into a world of distress, then on June 24 his body was found in the Columbia River, I remember that day as if it happened yesterday, I was at work when I got a phone call from Jordon's mom saying that I need to go talk to Zach's mom cause some of the women she worked with had seen the police talking to Zach's mom then seconds later Jordon was there. We went there and Zach's mom walked up to us and said Zach
Loved you both and hugged us, we both broke out into tears. I couldn't believe it was true. Growing up I only had two best friends Zach and Corey, my mom and sister were my only other friends, so I called them immediately. Rumors spread very fast were I live on the account that were a small city. The only other thing I could think to do was call my friend Jen who also was friends with him, and let her know I didn't want some random person, who didn't know her or Zach to say anything, that was one of the hardest phone calls I have ever made. We had a celebration of life for Zach, very few of us wore black, it was a sea of purple- Zach's Favorite color. Now a lot of people wonder why we did not hold a funeral, the reason being because we all knew that he would not want us to remember him for the tragedy that happened, he would want u to remember him for the way he was; with his amazing personality, and he was full of humor.
I've lost many people in my life, but nothing has ever compared to the loss of Zach, probably because he's the one who got me through the most, he was always there when I needed him, I remember one night I was feeling down on myself and he was texting me and It was like midnight and he simply said I'll be there in 10 mins, we spent the whole night talking and watching movies, which was just what I needed. This loss hit me pretty hard, I slipped into situational depression, I refused to take meds, I ended up falling into unhealthy habits, I either wouldn't eat or i'd eat to much, I put on 15lbs, I stopped do things I enjoyed, I stopped living in general, it was like I was on auto pilot. I know that Zach would not want me to be unhappy, I'm going to start keeping my promises to you Zach, I miss you, I love you. I'm sorry i've taken so long to get off auto pilot.
From this day forward, i'm going to do the things I love, I'm going to take better care of myself, and those around me. I'm going to paint,exercise, follow my dreams.... Always Smile I miss you Zach you always have a place in my heart.
Jeje&Zaza aka Jessica and Zach-I miss you.
(ps.sorry if this entry was a bit all over the place, I was so hard for me to write)
